Wanted Yaya!

Have you already watched this video?

It's very heartbreaking! How could someone hurt a helpless baby? What kind of people can do this to a one year old baby? More details on Facebook.

I can't imagine the pain, regret and guilt the baby's parents are going through right now. Most especially the mother. It was not just heartbreaking it's more than that to see your precious child being maltreated.

This another cruelty of yaya makes me think not only twice, but hundred times if we will still look for a new yaya. And just a few days before I watched this video, my son told me something that really broke my heart.

While we were eating dinner, from out of the blue, Matthew told me.

Matt: Mommy, yun mga kinukuha nyong yaya ko minamaltrato nila po ako.

I was shocked of what I heard so I asked him why he said that.

Matt: Kasi po si Ate (name of our ex-yaya), kinukulong nya ko sa kwarto kapag hindi ko binabantayan si Nanay (my beloved mother).

Mommy: Pinababantayan nya sa yo?

Matt: Opo. Tapos pinapapasok nya ko sa kwarto kapag naglilinis sya. Hindi nya ko pinalalabas, wala po ako makausap. Kaya sarili ko na lang kinakausap ko.

I hugged him tight. Naiiyak ako pero pinigil ko. I remember also when he told that same ex-yaya, cursed him. I confronted her immediately and told her I will terminate her if she did that again. During that time kasi I have no choice and all I think about was it's hard to find a helper. I let it passed because he's not hurting my son naman, which I really regret now because I didn't know my son was mentally abused na pala.

Regret and guilt... I have plenty of those. For seven years, almost every year, I have been tested on whether to quit or not to quit my full-time work. I always chose the former because of this main reason - we want to give our son the best future he can have. Also, we are still paying for our house.

Also, it's hard to quit a good career right? Then people around us will ask why will I quit my work, ngayon pa daw bang malaki na si Matthew?

Pressured ako actually. I am the mother, I should be the one taking care of my son. If ever my son will act indifferently, people will point at me. Nabayaang bata, that's what people with little understanding will think. That's why I told Daddy A what Matthew told me. I was teary eyed and he just listen. Then he said, if ever I finally decided to quit my work, he will support my decision daw.

That said, I felt a little relief. Finally, I will get a full support from my husband. Before kasi he would tell me "baka hindi natin kayanin kung ako lang may work." Ayun nawalan na din ako ng pag-asa. What makes him change his mind now? Aside from our house monthly amortization will end 8 months from now, we have savings in the bank and stock investment. Hindi man kalakihan but that's give us assurance that we can make it through until we finished our house payment.

Besides, we are earning money from our blogs. Also, I still have Momaye's Shoppe and Mom and Dad Crochet na napabayaan ko na because of work. I have so much plans and there so many opportunities and possibilities out there. I don't need to sacrifice my son's safety or tolerate another abusive helper.

Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against yaya or helper and I am not telling all of them are abusive. I want to believe I have never hired one but after what Matthew told me, only God knows. I actually don't want to think about it because I want to believe they never abused our son. Because we been very kind to them and for that reason sana they took good care of our son.

Alam ko maraming nakakarelate sa akin dyan. This should be a wake up call to not easily entrust our kids to people we really don't know. We can easily earn money but we can't take back time. Regrets and guilt will forever haunt us. It's hard but I am making a big decision soon with God's grace. Hopefully, its wanted yaya no more.

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Hello September! (To Quit or Not to Quit)

Hello September! Yes guys, September na po. Ang bilis! With that, Christmas is coming. Excited na kayo hano?

Ako naman, although excited na din, medyo may pinagdadaanan lang. I finally let go of our househelp/yaya. I know it is super hard to find one now and she's with us for 1 year na din. Kaya lang it came to a point na feeling ko I am being abused na and she's still not grateful pa. Anyway, I will not dwell with it anymore. Bahala na tadhana sa kanya, haha.

Every year na lang, this situation comes when I am being challenged to quit my work and be a stay at home mom. That's my dream but there are things to consider and also, I don't want to regret quitting my job. Especially now that I had a promotion, that I worked hard for.

For now, my father in law volunteered to accompany Matthew. But that's until Sunday lang since he has work too. I asked Matthew nga if he can go home alone na, but he replid with "mommy bata lang ako, 6 years old lang." Oo nga naman, bata pa sya.

Matthew is growing to be a very independent boy. He can wash his self and dress up. He can also feed his self and wash the dishes. At heto pa, pag-uwi namin kahapon nagsusumbong ang lolo nya na hindi daw nya maawat maglaba. Yes, nilabhan lang naman nya yun mga pinagbihisan nya. The other day kasi, tinuruan ko sya maglaba ng underwear nya and ayan na nga ang resulta.

I am happy that at 6 years old, he's showing concern and is very willing to help with the house chores. Kaya lang naguguilty ako kasi parang I am forcing him to grow up na. I also fear that one day, he will not need us anymore.

How I wish it's easier to make decisions. I know naman we can survive with one-salary income, but we want to provide our son the best that we can. I read nga sa Sibika book nya na ang ibang Nanay ay nagtatrabaho din upang higit na matugunan ang pangangailangan ng pamilya. Tama naman kasi we, parents, just want the best for our kids.

So Daddy and I are discussing to come up with the best decision. Hindi naman kasi bagay o pera ang nakataya dito. Kundi si Matthew, who is the most important person to us. That's why if we really can't find a good replacement, na sana ayoko na din at mahirap makisama, I will surely quit my job. Who would have not want spending more time with your kids, like just eating lollipop while lying on bed?

So to quit or not to quit? I will leave everything to God and trust him with all my heart and so that whatever will happen, whatever we decide on, that's the best plan for us.

Have a Blessed September!

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A Weekend without House Help

I grew up without any house help at home. That's why I wonder how my mother managed to run our household of 3 children and a full time work out side home. She did all the house chores from cooking, washing dishes to laundry, cleaning the house. Galing di ba?

Moving to the present, we hired a house help/yaya at home since Daddy A and I are working full time. I think this is one of the disadvantages of living independently away from our home town. If only we live just few blocks away from my parent in law then this would never be a problem for us. Who doesn't love to stay in a place where you grew up, close to all your family and relatives. But this what life gave us so we need to embrace it and be happy with what our current situation is. Anyway, we are blessed so I need not to complain right?

Here's the real story. Since our house help needs a rest too, we allowed her to take the weekend off to go home. When we went home from work last Saturday, our home is a big mess. With no house help, what can I do but to do all the chores. Look who's enjoying the mess.

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The Search is on for a New Yaya

Yes momsies, Matt's Tita (nanny/yaya) finally bid goodbye. What can I do it's her decision naman. I know it's so hard to find a trustworthy yaya. That's why when she asked our permission for a 2-week vacation, I sensed already that she has other plan na. 

Like a song "some good things never last," we have to find an immediate replacement for her. I told you naman that Matt's yaya is so masipag, malinis sa bahay and I know how much she loves Matt. But I have learned about the stories of her wrong doings and words that really hurt me. It hurts me because I don't expect her to act like that and as far as I know we are good to her. I fully trust her kasi. I trust Matt to her then all of the sudden she's doing not right to my son pala. No, I don't confront her but God knows how much I want to tell that to her face. I told Daddy that when she feels like moving out then we just have let her go. As much as possible I don't want to see her go with a heavy heart. Still, I respect her being the sister of my MIL's sister-in-law.

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